I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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