How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
The power of my boobs compel you
Randomize
