Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
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