Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
