i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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