I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
