Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
