no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize