You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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