It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
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