Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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