Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
