just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
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