Redeem this text for a blowjob
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
No subtext here. People are naked.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
