Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I supernannyed him into submission
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
