on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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