I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
We are two peas in an std pod
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
