I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
