at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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