i just google imaged poop.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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