I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
i think i just naturally attract stoners
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
