Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
