What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
