At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
this will be a night to untag.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
