I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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