What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
