I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
PANTIES FOUND
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
