Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
