Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
