I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Randomize
