Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Randomize
