the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
