I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
