She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Randomize
