Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
