Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
