That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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