I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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