and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I want to fling myself into the sun
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Randomize
