would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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