the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
He better not be in your backpack
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
