I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
