oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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