It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
