Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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