I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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