We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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