Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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