i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
