What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
